Loving someone is easy, but staying with them in that relationship and seeing all the highs and lows needs tremendous grit and patience. Then, it is natural that some may lack this patience and leave it on the way. Nothing comes easy in life, not even love. You need to fight for it and win it. When you don’t get a chance to experience it, you should look for it with renewed vigor instead of losing hope. In this article, we explain what it means to give up on love and why you shouldn’t do it. Continue reading to know more.
What Does It Mean To Give Up On Love?
Life often puts us through some unpleasant experiences, especially in matters of the heart. And it is quite natural that you will try to run away from the pain – lock your heart and shut it out. You may become cynical and pessimistic and even back off from a possible relationship or dating. It is understandable if you don’t want to deal with unmet expectations, drama, betrayal, and disappointments. However, you cannot lock yourself up forever. Yes, love hurts. It breaks your heart. It causes disappointment. But love also heals. It melts all blockages and opens your heart and soul to all the positive aspects of life. Remember that love is not going to be easy, but it will always be worth it. All you need to do is, accept this fact and move on without losing hope. Here are a few reasons why you shouldn’t give up on love.
Reasons For Not Giving Up On Love
1. Not Every Experience Is The Same
Not every relationship or experience is the same, and it is not wise to judge love based on singular or isolated situations. It is daunting to put yourself in vulnerable situations, especially if someone breaks your heart. However, just because you went through a painful experience does not mean you will experience it again. It also does not guarantee that you will not encounter tough situations. All these experiences will make you stronger and help you judge the situation better. Never let these bad experiences get on your mind and doubt yourself.
2. There Is A Right Time For Everything
“Are you ready, are you ready for love?” – remember the song by Elton John? Have you ever asked yourself if you are truly ready for love? To be committed to someone for life? This is a question everyone should ask themselves. Life is unpredictable, and you never know when you may bump into your soulmate. However, if the timing is not right and if both of you are not ready, it is simply not going to click. When someone is self-aware, they know it right away and let you know their minds. However, others will just keep dragging things, leading to heartbreak. There’s no alarm clock to let you know the right time. You know it when you feel confident that you are ready, you are mature enough to deal with all situations, and you have learned your lessons from your experiences. You just have to be patient and wait for someone with the same readiness. Remember, it only takes one genuine connection to make you believe in love again.
3. People Love Differently
You might be someone who expresses love through physical affection, while your partner may express it differently. For instance, they may do little things to help you, like taking out the trash or making sure you never run out of milk. In life, you meet people who love you in different ways. Sometimes, you might not reciprocate or appreciate, or even acknowledge their ways as they do not match your expectations. Just because you have not found the person who loves you the way you want to does not mean you are not loved. Do not feel disappointed and give up on love. Instead, try to understand their language of love.
4. Love Makes You A Happy Person
Love adds value to your life. Being loved and loving others makes us happy. It also keeps us from feeling lonely as we feel more connected to the world around us. When you give up on love, you close your doors to all these wonderful feelings. This might make you feel self-centered, and you may become indifferent to that feeling and be skeptical. This shouldn’t be the case – why settle for something less when you deserve the world? Sharing your life with someone makes it much more beautiful and a learning experience. You will never feel alone during the tough times, and you will have someone to share your victories and happiness with.
5. Feelings Are Fickle
It is normal to feel disappointed after a failed date or relationship. However, you will overcome that soon. Everyone goes through ups and downs in a relationship and, at one point, may feel it’s not working. It takes constant effort from both partners to keep a relationship going. Think of the good times you had together and the memories you created. If you see the good times outweigh the fights or disagreements you had – you will already feel the disappointment evaporating from your mind.
6. You Got Together For A Reason
There is a reason you fell in love with a partner. Out of all the people in the world, you found each other. Cherish the positive attributes of each other and work on the negative aspects of the relationship. Remember that nobody is perfect, and we can not burden others with our expectations. One of the most common mistakes we make is to assume things, jump to conclusions. Instead of giving up on love, figure out how to deal with unmet expectations in a relationship. Talk to your partner, and let them know how you feel to resolve any issues you face.
7. Love Is A Journey And Not A Destination
” ‘tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all” – Alfred Lord Tennyson This is so true! Heartbreaks and romantic regrets are tough to handle. However, these make you mature and evolve, and you understand how to handle a relationship and what mistakes to avoid. Life is not a fairytale, and you may not always end up with your prince charming. All “happily ever afters” are going to be a bumpy ride. In an ideal world, people often outgrow each other. Their priorities change, their dreams and goals may take them on a different life trajectory. Despite their best intentions and efforts, sometimes, relationships just do not work or end up in a marriage. This is no reason to give up on love. Appreciate that you got to experience love and share a part of your life with someone special. No one can predict whether people end up together or not. So, enjoy the journey and don’t focus too much on the destination. Find out in the next section what you should do if you feel like giving up on love.
What To Do When You Feel Like Giving Up On Love
If you are single (or have been through a broken relationship):
1. Figure It Out
Understand what did not work out in your relationship. Trace your steps back and analyze where things went wrong? Betrayal, misunderstandings, higher expectations, communication issues – there can be many reasons. If you have been dating, figure out what went wrong with the dates. Did they have different expectations or both of you had different life goals? Learn from your experiences. Once you understand and figure out why, you cannot repeat the same mistakes and judge the situation better.
2. Build Yourself
Before you find love, it is a good idea to build (or rebuild) yourself. Figure out what you want in life. Are you ready for a long-term commitment? Consider your career goals and dreams – what if a situation comes where you may have to give up on one thing to be with your love? Are you ready for that, or are you mature enough to take the alternate route? What if it means you have to maintain a long-distance relationship? Can you survive that? What about family and your plans? Love is an important part of life, but other aspects of life are equally important and fulfilling. Prepare yourself to swim and take on the waves before jumping again into the ocean called love.
3. Surround Yourself With A Support System
Confide in a friend or a trusted family member who can support and comfort you. Put yourself out of the comfort zone. Be open to conversations and people. Often, different perspectives help you get a complete picture and understand the situation.
4. Seek Professional Help
Talk to a therapist. Work out the underlying issues that give you anxiety or stress. Feeling lonely, isolating yourself can lead to depression. A therapist can help you figure out your feelings and suggest ways to deal with them constructively. They can guide you to understand the complexities of a relationship and explain how to handle matters maturely.
If you are in a relationship:
1. Get To The Root Cause
Reevaluate your feelings. Try to understand why you feel this way and the reason. Talk to your partner and discuss how the situation can be sorted before thinking about giving up.
2. Set Clear Expectations
Figure out what you want from a relationship. Be clear about your expectations with your partner. This will help both of you avoid any disappointments in the coming days.
3. Do not Assume, Ask
Do not make any assumptions about your feelings or partner or the relationship. Talk to your partner and be expressive. Let them know how you feel and understand what is going inside their minds. This will clear the air and any misunderstandings you may have and help resolve the issues.
4. Set Your Priorities
Prioritize your relationship. Distance often makes you feel alienated. If you have been absorbed in work, take a break. Have rituals in place- like date nights or spend quality time together in other ways. In this way, you don’t feel like love is fading.
5. Work On It
Work on your relationship, and do not just give up. Love may seem magical at first, but it takes a lot of effort from both partners to keep it going. Commitment, sacrifices, adjustments, kindness, and forgiveness are pillars that keep a relationship strong. If both of you communicate and work together, you can rekindle your relationship. Is it okay to give up on love? Check out the below infographic that lists some songs to listen to when things get hard in your relationship. These songs give you a reason to stay strong and believe in each other and the power of love. Love comes in all shapes and sizes and is not limited to romantic relationships. So, even if you feel like giving up on romantic relationships you may not be giving up on love. It is okay to want to refrain from entering relationships, but closing off your heart to love can only cause more pain and loneliness. Why do I push away the person I love? You may have been hurt in previous relationships and have a fear of intimacy. This may make you want to protect yourself against further heartache and pain and so you push away the one you love. How do you walk away from someone you love? The first thing to do is to assess closely why you want to walk away from someone you love. If you absolutely cannot find a reason or way to stay, you begin by having an honest conversation and help each other get closure.